裔笑星黄西Joe Wong再次做客Letterman表演英语单口相声：This I Believe
美国深夜节目收视率冠军的“大卫赖特曼秀”，2009年4月17日晚上破天荒邀请中国口音极重的黄西(Joe Wong)亮相，以英语讲美式笑话，近六分钟的演出，观众反应热烈。黄西一炮而红，并被称为“美版的周立波”。2012年03月30华裔笑星黄西Joe Wong 再次做客Letterman深夜秀，以”This I Believe”系列段子大展冷面笑匠的恶搞功力这次主要吐槽移民政策和保险杠贴纸。
Joe Wong –March 30, 2012, episode of Late Show with David Letterman.
Hi everybody. I see a lot of really cocky bumper stickers, you know, like “My son is an honor student” or “This car climbed Mount Washington.” I just want to see some humble ones: like “My son just moved back in with us” or “I am on Facebook,” “I have two friends.” So when I drive in certain states in this country I have to have my papers ready because I’m an immigrant. And then I learned that the term “immigrant” has a negative connotation. I think that’s probably why on those immigration papers the United States government decided to call us “Aliens”. Sounds so much nicer, you know. “Hey, we’re not here to take your jobs, we are just here to abduct you.”
I heard this from my car radio a program called “This I believe” where people talk about what they really believe in. And I prepared some material for that show and I just want to share it with you guys tonight. So “This I believe” by Joe Wong. I believe that school closings for parents are kind of like the Guantanamo Bay situation. In the beginning we’re like “Yeah it’s closed” “Oh no, they’re coming here.” And I believe that “Dominos” is a terrible name for a chain restaurant. And I believe that laughter is the best medicine but it’s the worst prescription. “Looks like you have pneumonia, hahaha.” And I believe that if I were to die in a car accident I want to be a collision with a cement truck. That way immediately after I die there is a statue for me.
And I believe that when the lord comes back, he would be driving a car with bumper sticker that say "What would I do?" And he should have his papers ready, because his name is Jesus. (Hesus, Word is Jesus) And I believe that that God is a woman, because she never forgets anything you’ve ever done. And she’d punish us with vengeance, only because she loves you.
重点词汇：
1、Euphemism：委婉语
2、Cocky：conceited or arrogant
3、bumper sticker：保险杆贴纸
4、immigrant：who lives abroad permanently移民
5、connotation：suggested meaning, 弦外之音
6、alien：外星人，侨民
7、abduct：take someone away illegally
8、prescription：处方
9、pneumonia：肺炎
10、collision：冲撞 smash
11、cement：水泥
12、statue：雕像