TED演讲之什么是爱:玩转婚恋网(3)

So knowing that there was superficial data

既然公式配对,

that was being used to match me up with other people,

用的是肤浅信息

I decided instead to ask my own questions.

我决定,自己问问题

What was every single possible thing

我要找的,另一半

that I could think of that I was looking for in a mate?

需要具备,哪些条件呢?

So I started writing and writing and writing,

我开始写,不停地写

and at the end, I had amassed

到最后,

72 different data points.

我积攒了72个数据点

I wanted somebody was Jew…ish,

我想找,犹太人

so I was looking for somebody who had the same

找一个与我有,

background and thoughts on our culture,

共同文化背景和观点的人

but wasn't going to force me to go to shul

但他又不会,强迫我

every Friday and Saturday.

每周五六去,犹太集会

I wanted somebody who worked hard,

我想找一个,勤奋的人

because work for me is extremely important,

因为我觉得,工作特别重要

but not too hard.

但不能,工作狂

For me, the hobbies that I have

对我来说,我的兴趣

are really just new work projects that I've launched.

无非是我的,一些新项目

I also wanted somebody who not only wanted two children,

我还想找一个,打算生两个小孩

but was going to have the same attitude toward parenting that I do,

而且在育儿方面和我,观点一致的人

so somebody who was going to be totally okay

也就是说,他完全不介意

with forcing our child to start taking piano lessons at age three,

要孩子三岁学钢琴

and also maybe computer science classes

可能还外加一些,电脑课

if we could wrangle it.

如果,条件允许的话

So things like that, but I also wanted somebody

除此之外,我还想找一个

who would go to far-flung, exotic places,

愿意,远足异乡的人

like Petra, Jordan.

一起去,约旦的彼得拉

I also wanted somebody who would weigh

还有,我希望他

20 pounds more than me at all times,

比我重20磅,不论时间

regardless of what I weighed.

也不论我当时,体重是多少

So I now have these 72 different data points,

有了这 72个数据点

which, to be fair, is a lot.

说实话,还真不少了

So what I did was, I went through

接下来着,我整理出

and I prioritized that list.

优先次序

I broke it into a top tier and a second tier of points,

分两层,排列这些数据点

and I ranked everything starting at 100

然后从100

and going all the way down to 91,

排到91?

and listing things like I was looking for somebody who was really smart,

写的有,我希望找一个,很聪明的人

who would challenge and stimulate me,

一个可以给我带来,挑战和刺激的人

and balancing that with a second tier

然后在第二层

and a second set of points.

放上,另外一组数据点

These things were also important to me

这些对我,同样重要

but not necessarily deal-breakers.

但不是,必不可少

So once I had all this done,

列表完毕,之后

I then built a scoring system,

我开始,建立计分系统

because what I wanted to do

我想尝试,

was to sort of mathematically calculate

借助数学计算出

whether or not I thought the guy that I found online

我和网站人选,

would be a match with me.

是否匹配

I figured there would be a minimum of 700 points

我想,对方至少要达到700分

before I would agree to email somebody

才给他,发电子邮件

or respond to an email message.

或者,回信

For 900 points, I'd agree to go out on a date,

达到900分,才答应约会

and I wouldn't even consider any kind of relationship

我不会轻易,投入感情

before somebody had crossed the 1,500 point threshold.

除非对方,超过1500分才可以考虑

Well, as it turns out, this worked pretty well.

这个方法,还挺有效的

So I go back online now.

我回到,婚恋网

I found Jewishdoc57

发现了 Jewishdoc57

who's incredibly good-looking, incredibly well-spoken,

他出奇地帅,而且谈吐出众

he had hiked Mt. Fuji,

曾经登上,富士山

he had walked along the Great Wall.

徒步长城

He likes to travel as long as it doesn't involve a cruise ship.

而且他喜欢旅行,只要没有游船就好

And I thought, I've done it!

我想,我成功了!

I've cracked the code.

编码已被破解

I have just found the Jewish Prince Charming

我终于发现了,犹太白马王子

of my family's dreams.

正如,家人所愿

There was only one problem:

问题,只有一个

He didn't like me back.

他,并不喜欢我

And I guess the one variable that I haven't considered

看来有一个变数,我还没考虑

is the competition.

那就是,竞争对手

Who are all of the other women

社交网站,

on these dating sites?

都有哪些,其他的女性?

I found SmileyGirl1978.

我发现了 SmileyGirl1978

She said she was a "fun girl who is Happy and Outgoing."

她说她是 "快乐、活泼、有趣的女孩"

She listed her job as teacher.

她填写的职业是,教师

She said she is "silly, nice and friendly."

她说她 "很傻,很友善“

She likes to make people laugh "alot."

“常常”爱逗大家笑

At this moment I knew, clicking after profile

就在那一刻,在点击完一个又一个

after profile after profile that looked like this,

类似的个人档案之后

that I needed to do some market research.

我知道还需要,市场调研

So I created 10 fake male profiles.

接着我建立了 10个虚拟的,男士档案

Now, before I lose all of you —

在人都,走光之前

understand that I did this

我想请大家,谅解我的初衷

strictly to gather data

仅仅是,收集数据

about everybody else in the system.

去了解系统内的,其他人

I didn't carry on crazy Catfish-style relationships with anybody.

我并没有,借此进行任何不道德的交流

I really was just scraping their data.

确实只是,收集数据

But I didn't want everybody's data.

还不是,所有人的数据

I only wanted data on the women

仅限女性,那些

who were going to be attracted

我的理想伴侣,

to the type of man that I really, really wanted to marry.

可能会喜欢的女性

When I released these men into the wild,

我把虚拟男士,放出来之后

I did follow some rules.

还遵守了,一些规矩

So I didn't reach out to any woman first.

首先我没有,主动联系女性

I just waited to see who these profiles were going to attract,

只等着看,能吸引到谁

and mainly what I was looking at was two different data sets.

主要关注点,有两方面

So I was looking at qualitative data,

首先是,定性数据

so what was the humor, the tone,

比如,幽默感,语调

the voice, the communication style

声音,沟通方式

that these women shared in common?

这些女性,的共通点是什么?

And also quantitative data,

还有,定量数据

so what was the average length of their profile,

比如,个人档案的平均长度

how much time was spent between messages?

两次通信之间,隔多久

What I was trying to get at here was

我想证明的是

that I figured in person,

如果有机会,面对面交流

I would be just as competitive

我的竞争力

as a SmileyGirl1978.

不比SmileyGirl1978差

I wanted to figure out how to maximize

所以,我想知道怎么调整,网上档案

my own profile online.

才能最好地,呈现自己

演讲简介

艾米·韦伯 (Amy Webb)在婚恋网运气不佳--看上的人不回复,约她的人又谈不拢(还有更糟的)。所以,这位数据迷开始列表运算找幸福。来听听她如何玩转婚恋网,把烦人的遭遇化为改变命运的快乐机遇。

重点讲解:

1.force sb to do 强迫某人做某事

例句:Can you not always force me to do things what I don't enjoy?

你可以不要总是逼我做我不喜欢的事情吗?

2.things like that 类似这些;诸如此类

例句:Chinese paper cuts, Chinese paintings, or other things like that , or even you can cook a Chinese dish and bring it with you.

中国剪纸、中国画等诸如此类的东西,或者你可以做一道中国菜带上。

3.regardless of 不管;不顾;不理会

例句:Regardless of how much patience we have, we would prefer never to use any of it.

无论我们有多大的耐心,我们都希望永远不要用到它。

4.to be fair 说句公道话;公平地说

例句:To be fair, the authorities seem to have learnt some lessons.

公平地讲,日本官方似乎已经吸取了一些教训。


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