And this is where my story starts. When I was a young researcher, doctoral student, 我的故事从这里开始。当我还是个年轻的博士研究生的时候， my first year, I had a research professor who said to us, "Here's the thing, if you cann
And so then I went back into the research and spent the next couple of years really trying to understand what they, 然后我再度投入到了我的研究中，又花了几年时间， the whole-hearted, what choices they were making, and what w
And all you can think about is that opportunity for growth, right? 然后你满脑子都想着那一点成长的空间，不是么。 Well, apparently this is the way my work went as well, because, when you ask people about love, they tell you
I was like, "Okay." So I found a therapist. My first meeting with her, Diana -- I brought in my list of the way the whole-hearted live, and I sat down. 就这样我找到了一个心理医生。我跟她，戴安娜的第一次见面--我带去了一份表单，上面都是那些全身心投
What do these people have in common? I have a slight office supply addiction, but that's another talk. 这群人有什么共同之处？我对办公用品有点痴迷，但这是另一个话题了。 So I had a manila folder, and I had a Sharpie, and I was like, w
The other thing that they had in common was this: They fully embraced vulnerability. 他们还有另外一个共同之处，那就是，他们全然接受脆弱。 They believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful. 他们相信，让他们变得脆弱的东西，也让他们变得
You know this. So, I could tell you a lot about shame, but I'd have to borrow everyone else's time. 你知道这个（结果）。我能告诉你关于耻辱的很多东西，但那样我就得占用别人的时间了。 But here's what I can tell you that it boils down to -- and
You can't numb those hard feelings without numbing the other affects, our emotions. 你无法只麻痹那些痛苦的情感，而不麻痹所有的感官，所有的情感。 You cannot selectively numb. So when we numb those, we numb joy, we numb gratitude, w
And we perfect, most dangerously, our children. Let me tell you what we think about children. 我们想要让我们的孩子变得完美，这是最危险的。让我告诉你我们是如何看待孩子的。 They're hardwired for struggle when they get here. And when you hol
So, I'll start with this: a couple years ago, an event planner called me because I was going to do a speaking event. 那我就这么开始吧：几年前，一个活动策划人打电话给我，因为我当时要做一个演讲。 And she called, and she said, "I'm really st
