TED演讲:大爱无疆 爱本无条件(11)
Ironically, it turns out, that it's our differences, and our negotiation of difference,that unite us.
讽刺的是,事实证明,正是我们的不同和我们协商彼此的不同将我们连结起来。
I decided to have children while I was working on this project.
当我做这个项目的时候我决定要孩子。
And many people were astonished and said,
很多人对此感到惊奇,
But how can you decide to have children in the midst of studying everything that can go wrong?
你怎么能做出要孩子的决定,当你的研究是关于不如意的,且只进行到一半?
And I said, I'm not studying everything that can go wrong.
我说,我研究的不是那些不如意。
What I'm studying is how much love there can be,even when everything appears to be going wrong.
我研究的是,有多少爱可以给予,甚至当一切似乎都是个错误的情况下。
I thought a lot about the mother of one disabled child I had seen,
我想起我见过的一个残疾孩子的母亲,
a severely disabled child who died through caregiver neglect.
这个有严重残疾的孩子,因为照料不周而去世。
And when his ashes were interred, his mother said,
当他的骨灰被安葬的时候,他的母亲说,
I pray here for forgiveness for having been twice robbed,
我在这里祈祷宽恕,我失去了两个,
once of the child I wanted and once of the son I loved.
一个是我想要的孩子,一个是我所爱着的儿子。
And I figured it was possible then for anyone to love any child if they had the effective will to do so.
我以为任何一个人都可以去爱任何孩子,如果他们有能力就会这样做。
So my husband is the biological father of two children with some lesbian friends in Minneapolis.
我的丈夫是两个孩子的亲生父亲,这两个孩子的母亲是,他在明尼阿波利斯市的女同性恋朋友。
I had a close friend from college who'd gone through a divorce and wanted to have children.
我大学时期有一个亲密的朋友,她离了婚却也想要孩子。
And so she and I have a daughter,
所以我和她生了一个女儿,
and mother and daughter live in Texas.
母亲和女儿居住在德克萨斯州。
And my husband and I have a son who lives with us all the time of whom I am the biological father,
我丈夫和我有个儿子和我们一起生活,我是他的生父,
and our surrogate for the pregnancy was Laura,
为我们代孕的女士是劳拉,
the lesbian mother of Oliver and Lucy in Minneapolis.
她是明尼阿波利斯市奥利弗和露西的女同性恋母亲。
养育一个和你有本质差异的孩子(他/她可能是神童,残疾人或罪犯)有着怎样的感触?在这个平和且感人至深的演讲中,作家安德鲁·所罗门分享了他和诸多父母的交谈:关于无条件的爱和无条件的接纳之间的那条线。
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