TED演讲:如何培养出成功的小孩(4)
And our kids, regardless of where they end up at the end of high school, they’re breathless.
我们的孩子，无论高中毕业时结果怎样，都被压得喘不过气。
They’re brittle. They’re a little burned out.
他们心理脆弱，精疲力竭。
They’re a little old before their time, wishing the grown-ups in their lives had said,
他们比实际年龄更老成，盼望着大人告诉他们，
“What you’ve done is enough, this effort you’ve put forth in childhood is enough.”
“你已经做得够多了，小时候这么努力已经足够了。”
And they’re withering now under high rates of anxiety and depression and some of them are wondering,
他们现在却在高分的焦虑和沮丧中慢慢枯萎，有的孩子会想，
will this life ever turn out to have been worth it?
这样的人生最后究竟有没有意义？
Well, we parents, we parents are pretty sure it’s all worth it.
我们做父母的，当然认为这都有意义。
We seem to behave — it’s like we literally think
我们所表现出来的，
they will have no future if they don’t get into one of these tiny set of colleges or careers we have in mind for them.
就像如果他们进不去我们期望的这几所好大学，或者找不到好工作，他们就没有未来。
Or maybe, maybe, we’re just afraid they won’t have a future we can brag about to our friends
或者，只是我们认为可以在朋友面前炫耀，
and with stickers on the backs of our cars. Yeah.
或者只是贴在车屁股上的未来。就是这样。
But if you look at what we’ve done, if you have the courage to really look at it,
但如果你看看这件事的后果，如果你有勇气看的话，
you’ll see that not only do our kids think their worth comes from grades and scores,
你会发现这不只让孩子认为他们的价值来自于成绩和分数，
but that when we live right up inside their precious developing minds all the time,
更是在他们正在成长的意识里，
like our very own version of the movie “Being John Malkovich,” we send our children the message:
就像我们自己的电影《傀儡人生》一样，我们给孩子传递了一个信号：
“Hey kid, I don’t think you can actually achieve any of this without me.”
“嘿，孩子，没有我你什么都干不成。”