名人演讲 :同性恋与道德的关系(19)
It's important because it puts a face on the issue.
它之所以重要，是因为它让你直面问题所在。
Now, a lot of people at this point will say to me, "You had me part of the way, but now here you go being all open about it now, and that's what I don't get."
说到这里，很多人可能会对我说："你让我懂了不少，但是你现在开始鼓吹同性恋展示自我，这让我很不解。"
A couple days ago, I got an e-mail.
几天前，我收到一封邮件。
It was actually a very nice e-mail.
一封非常友善的邮件。
The title of the e-mail was "looking to understand," and the person was really genuinely, I think, trying to understand something about homosexuality.
标题是"寻求理解"。我相信写信人是真心想要寻求对于同性恋的理解。
And he or she wrote, I never remember it was male or female.
他写道，我不记得是男士还是女士了。
But the person wrote, "You know, I don't understand that if you're okay with it, why do you have to be open about it?
他写道："如果你对自己是同性恋的事情感到很自然，那为什么一定要公开地去表露这一点那？
Why does everyone have to know?
为什么要让所有人都知道？
I don't understand why gay people have to be so open about it."
我不太懂为什么同性恋朋友都要这么公开和张扬呢？"
And I've heard this question before.
我以前就听过这类问题。
First person I ever hear this question from was my mother.
而第一个问出这种问题的，是我妈妈。
Back when I came out to my parents, many years ago, we used to have long discussions, and I remember during one of these discussions or arguments, whatever you want to call them.
很多年前，我刚和父母坦陈同性恋身份的时候，我们常常会有深入的长谈。我还记得有那么一段谈话-或者称之为争吵也行。
We didn't throw things, but there was lively you know, one of these discussion my mother said, "I just don't understand why you have to be so open about your sexuality!
毕竟我们没打起来。我妈妈说："我真搞不懂为什么你非得如此公开自己的性取向？
Your father and I aren't open about our sexuality!"
你爸爸和我从未这么公开张扬过自己的性取向！"
I want you to think about that sentence.
请诸位回顾一下这句话：
"Your father and I are not open about our sexuality."
"你爸爸和我从未这么公开张扬过自己的性取向！"
Not only is the person who utters that sentence openly heterosexual, she's also open about having sex at least once.
说这句话的人，不但公开清楚地陈述了自己是异性恋这个事实。她甚至还公开承认自己进行过不止一次性行为。
Heterosexual people do this all the time.
异性恋朋友们每天都在做这样的事情。
They talk about their wives, their husbands, their boyfriends, their girlfriends, people they have crushes on-perfectly normal.
他们谈论自己的妻子，谈论自己的丈夫，谈论自己的男朋友，谈论自己的女朋友，谈论自己暗恋的人–这种做法再正常不过。
We do the exact same thing and were "flaunting it," were "making an issue out of it," and that's a double standard.
而当我们做完全相同的事情的时候，我们就变成了"自我标榜"、"小题大做"，这显然是双重标准。
And it's not fair.
这显然不公平。
And I don't mean to pick on my mother here because, over the year, things have changed quite a bit.
在此我并非是想批评我妈妈，因为这么多年来，事情改变了很多。
She's grown; both of my parents have on this issue. They've been wonderful.
她也在成长。在这个问题上，我的父亲和母亲都非常宽容和通情达理。
Few years ago, I was home for Christmas with my partner, and my parents took us to this restaurant that they go to all the time.
几年前我和我的同性伴侣回家过圣诞节。他们老两口带我们去他们熟悉的饭馆吃饭。
So they know all of the waiters and waitresses by name.
我父母都能叫出那里所有服务员的名字。
At one point, we were sitting there eating, and my mother sees a waitress walk by and says, "Oh, Jane, come over here. I want you to meet my son, John, and his partner, Mark."
席间我妈妈看到一个认识的女服务员走过，她对她说："哦，珍妮，来这边，我想让你认识一下我的儿子约翰，和他的爱人马克。"
I nearly spit my food clear across the table.
我当时差点把嘴里的饭喷到桌子对面。
Who are you, and what have you done with my mother?
老天啊，我妈身上发生了什么？
It was such a powerful moment.
那真是个充满了戏剧性的瞬间。
It was a powerful moment, in part, because of what it said to me, which was, "You know what? We're not going to treat this like a dirty little secret anymore because there's no reason to."
它的张力在于，我妈妈的话对我来说，意味着"你知道什么？我们不会把我儿子是同性恋这件事看作是需要遮掩的秘密，没必要"。
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